Hello my poor little neglected blog,
I've thought of writing and posting so many times since my last post of (gasp) almost two months ago. What has been holding me back? Well, I have been more than a little concerned that if I let loose and just start writing it will end up nothing more than a big rant against so many things and who wants to read that?
This thinking has lead to questioning what a blog is for and what the posts on it are really about. I've been recalling all those pretty blogs I see that are full of tidy homes, fantastic meals, perfect projects, amazing children, etc. They seem to show a standard most mere mortals would find very hard to achieve. On the other end of the spectrum is the rant-fest where everything is wrong and horrible and boohoo and, and, and….. Neither seems right to me.
While I struggle and strive to figure things out (and I'm guessing I'm not the only one), I do know that I want to keep you, my little blog, going. Here's sort of how I think I can sum up how I've been feeling (just a snippet from the last couple months):
The ugly side of life: I'm getting increasingly frustrated with the selfish, thoughtless, rude behavior I encounter on the bus and when I walk to and from the office where I work (scary-angry drivers, pedestrians so focused on their "smart" phone they collide with others and then glare?!, demanding signature gatherers, aggressive panhandlers, and so forth). I am getting burned out on people and that scares me. I don't want to become one of those thoughtless, jaded types who stops caring about others.
The beautiful side of life: While riding the bus home from work the other night, a man who looked a little hard on his luck took a while getting on because he had 5-6 large cardboard boxes full of groceries (basic items but the sort of things you'd see for a picnic or other happy gathering). People on the bus moved to make room for him and his items and didn't shoot angry stares or grumble. He thanked all and tried to take up as little space as possible. When he neared his stop he apologetically told the bus driver it might take a little while for him to move all the boxes off of the bus. The bus driver said "no problem" and the other passengers echoed the sentiment. Then his stop came up and I watched four young women sitting nearby (they didn't seem to know each other) hop up and get the boxes to help. It was amazing. The man thanked them and they wished him a good evening.
I am making an effort to search out the positive and good each day rather than let myself be weighed down by all the bad stuff. I am trying to find some balance. For all that irks me, there is a lot of good out there.
More later,
Elizabeth